Roboroom

Shhhhhhweep goes the door as the green button is pressed. Opening upon a fairly clean commode I find this 'heaps' nicer than the last public washroom I'd turned down. I enter and press the inner green button - Shhhhwoop, the door closes behind me. A friendly voice from everywhere begins instructing me on how to go to the bathroom. The nicest touch however is when I take a seat and a full-piano version of What the World Needs Now (is Love, Sweet Love) begins playing for my enjoyment (and perhaps to muffle sounds to the outside world?). The song does not make up for the automated TP dispenser whirring and whirring without producing anything but noise (luckily I'd realized this ahead of time and had come prepared - hopefully the next 'bloke' did too!). The lack of soap from the laser guided dispenser was disappointing, but would have been forgiven if on the way out the room had sighed "Ahh, What a relief!"

Vancouver Olympics: Day 7 Highlights

- Visited the beautiful Richmond Olympic Oval, winner of many building awards, though we couldn't get all too close.

- Gave up on the Heineken House for fear of missing Canada vs. Switzerland men's hockey, and were rewarded for this decision by finding a massive bar tucked behind a Chinese market with not one, or two but three massive TVs in sightline, and $10 pitchers to boot.

- Rode the fastest ferris wheel of my life, whipping around above 13 Million cranberries making up the Olympic rings and a half-soccer-field sized Maple Leaf.

- Caught the beginning of the Arkells set from the portapotty I'd lined up to get into, but the remainder from right out front.

- Went on a trip down memory lane back to the 90's, chaperoned by Raine Maida the singer of Our Lady Peace. Engrained in the Canadian collective consciousness due to massive radio play (thanks CanCon!) OLP didn't disappoint. A string of hits made this a nostalgic 'Greatest Hits' show from start to finish.

Toilet Troubles

Having a nice stroll on the beach in Goa without anyone around when the few beers from the night before start rolling around in my guts again. Clenching to the nearest resort I'm pointed to a tiny shed around back. Inside is an American-style toilet, but I search frantically for toilet paper (knowing that there's nothing in my pockets to use) and found only a small bucket and a water tap. My first time coming upon this problem and I was in a desperate state. Shooing the lizard from the toilet seat I plugged my nose and shut the door - to realize that the daylight from the door crack had been my only source of light. Perhaps learning how to do it the "Indian way" was better in the dark anyhow.

Carrying on with the trip I began to think that American-style (by that I mean the thrones you sit on) had become the norm, but I was sadly just leading a cushioned lifestyle (hardly!). Shortly before boarding my night bus from Hampi back to Goa... (another story... school kids at the back of the bus would have loved the bumps. However me trying to sleep getting airborne while laying out; I wasn't a fan).. I realized that there was no toilet on the 10 or 12 hour bus ride and I'd better evacuate. Searching frantically as departure time neared I could hardly find a decent restaurant let alone a decent toilet. Running into a diner I'm directed upstairs.. I search to no avail and am pointed out on the ledge. Here I turn the corner and find a closet even smaller than the first, again without a light - and this time without a seat. Yes, the infamous hole-in-the-floor. Checking my watch I contemplate my options and realize that the only feasible one is to squat. That and the squatting is going to be that much more difficult with my 40lb bag on my back..